Have you ever watched someone you love nearly drown with grief and felt helpless because you couldn’t make it better? Have you ever held someone whose heart has been shattered into a million pieces? Or sat with someone whose world had been ripped apart, knowing they would need all the prayer and support they could get to survive the pain consuming them? Have you ever felt an exhaustion that went way beyond just being tired?
Let’s get even more honest. Have you ever secretly wondered somewhere deep within you, if maybe, just maybe, that life just wasn’t going to get much better this side of heaven? Have you ever wondered if maybe you were just going to be stuck in the valley because the mountaintop seemed to always be just out of reach? Have you ever just had to hide somewhere so you could sob it all out because you just couldn’t carry the weight of it all anymore?
Precious friend, if you understand the weight of any of the questions that I just asked, may I whisper a few words of truth to your heart. Honestly, I’m just going to be preaching truth to myself right now and hope that maybe someone understands and needs to hear this too. God is not afraid of your questions. Nor is He shocked or offended by your emotions. He already knows what you’re thinking and feeling, and He welcomes you to share your heart with Him.
God is not afraid of our feelings, emotions, or questions. He is big enough to handle them all and He wants us to be honest and pour out our hearts like water before Him (Lam. 2:19) as we give Him our troubles and sorrows. “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest” Matt. 11:28. I’m so grateful for this Scripture and the hope that it offers to a weary and heavy-burdened soul. How I have needed the rest He offers in recent days!
My heart has been so overwhelmed and sometimes the sorrow is so great that the only prayer I know to whisper is the name of Jesus. May I tell you a secret? That is enough! At the slightest whisper of His name, He is there. He gives strength to those who call upon Him. I know because He is the only thing that has gotten me through the last few days, weeks, and years, to be perfectly honest. Even in the deepest, darkest of valleys, He is there; He has not failed to carry me through.
The valley gets dark and honestly, some days I wonder if things will ever get better, but I cling to His promises. Some days the anxiety nearly smothers me, but I have learned that there is peace in His presence and comfort in His name. Dear heart, I hope you know the One of whom I speak; if not, I don’t know how you make it through this thing called life. He is the ONLY Reason I have made it this far, my friend. He is the Hope that has carried me when I had none.
So, on the days when I feel as if I cannot take another step, He helps me to keep going. I wake up, try to breathe through the anxiety that is pressing in so hard against my chest, and I go to Him. I pick up His Word and I find comfort; I find help. I whisper His name and I find peace. I talk to Him, and I am strengthened. Once again, I find Him faithful as He carries me when I can’t walk on my own. When I don’t know how to go on, I remind myself of truth, of who He is.
When I remember who He is, when I remember that He is still on the throne; I know that somehow, some way, He is going to see us through this hard time. I take comfort in the knowledge that the enemy hasn’t won; God’s purpose will prevail in the end. I am comforted by remembering that I can trust Him to bring about His purpose and His plan. I am reminded that even when it hurts, even when it is hard, He is still working in the midst of all the pain and all the sorrow.
When I can’t trust my feelings, when I can’t trust my circumstances, I remember that I can trust my God. Like Job said in Job 42:2, “I know that You can do all things and that no purpose of Your can be thwarted.” When I feel helpless, I remember that my God is not and I must choose to trust Him, not my feelings. Life is so hard, oh, so very hard, beautiful friend, but for the believer, we win in the end. And, I don’t know about you, but on days like today, I need that reminder!
Friend, I don’t know if any of this has made much sense, but writing is what I do, so here I am typing and trying to process all the emotions floating around in this heart of mine. Why? Because I am so very tired of the enemy trying to destroy so many hearts and lives. Because I needed to remind myself and maybe you too, that there is still hope, there is still help when you need it. I type through these tears to tell myself and anyone else who needs to hear it, that there is One who will always be there.
I am writing to remind myself and anyone else who needs to hear it, that He can and will be the peace you need in the midst of the darkest storms of your life. He is the rock that you can cling to; He will hold you and carry you through. I know because I have seen and experienced this so many, many times in my life. I don’t know much but I know my God is faithful and I can trust Him to see me through. “Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful” Heb. 10:23.
Beloved, I don’t pretend to have all the answers, but I trust the One who does. When hard times come, when sorrow weighs heavy, I look to Him, I get in His Word, and I find strength to keep pressing on, one day at a time, one step at a time. I remind myself of His faithfulness and I remind myself who He is. This truth strengthens and encourages me. And when I am simply too tired to go on, I whisper the name that is above all other names and let Him hold me close for a while.
The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23
I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world. John 16:33
You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Isaiah 26:3
Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in every way. The Lord be with you all. 2 Thessalonians 3:16
Katrina Douglas
